Whether it’s a relationship, a dream, or an activity you’ve enjoyed, letting go is hard. I’m having to let go of a lot in this new year and it’s been really hard. I ruminate about it, get angry, and depressed. Maybe you can relate.
The psychologist in me has a lot of solutions for my letting go woes. But my experience has been that while psychology can offer us tools, the Word of God is what powers them. Here’s the Bible’s How To for letting go:
Mourn
John 11:35 tells us Jesus wept. That’s important.
When I was in clinical practice, I saw many people who felt it wasn’t appropriate to mourn their loss.
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Most people agree with Dr. Seuss: Christmas doesn’t come from a store. It does, in fact, mean quite a bit more.
Unfortunately, most of my family’s Christmas seems to come from a store. We spend a lot of money shopping for gifts, food, and clothing at Christmas. That doesn’t seem right somehow.
So I’ve tried quite a number of things over the years to make our Christmas more meaningful:
Advent family devotions
Limiting gifts to gold, silver, and myrrh gifts
Giving more to charities like Samaritan’s Purse or World Vision
But still I’ve felt like Christmas could mean a little bit more.
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I’m thankful to have:
a place to lay my head each night,
food to eat to begin each day,
water to drink at the turn of a faucet,
a family who loves me,
and a country that allows me to worship God freely.
And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19
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Lord, I’m thankful for electronic reminders that keep me from forgetting important appointments.
Lord, I’m thankful for email and video calls that allow me to stay connected with family and friends far away.
Lord, I’m thankful for cell phones that make me less fearful about my kids.
Lord, I’m thankful for information that is available in an instant.
Lord, I’m thankful that Your Word is mobile, searchable, and sharable.
Father God, help me to remember as I go through my day that You have made the technology that we have possible. Every time I email, call, do a web search, or read your Word in digital formats, remind me to praise You.
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I was having a very difficult time coping with a miscarriage when a friend asked, “Can’t they put Prozac on your corn flakes or something?”
It was a well-meaning question, but at the heart of it was the idea that I should be over it. I shouldn’t still be grieving.
I’m Not the Only One
Some time later, I spoke to a women’s group about what the Lord had taught me through that very painful miscarriage.
A woman came up to me and said that decades after her miscarriage, she was under anesthesia for an unrelated surgery and the medical staff told her that she had been crying about her loss.
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It’s been a rotten day. Everything that could go wrong has gone wrong. There are all kinds of self-destructive things you could do in response, but you know you’ll end up feeling worse.
When you find yourself in the middle of a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day, what should you do?
Laugh
I was a college student on the way to my summer job one morning when my car ran out of gas. This was before cell phones that would have enabled me to let my boss know I was running late or to call for help.
I got out of the car and realized I would have to walk to the nearest gas station.
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Today is my birthday and I’m 46. It’s one of those times in life when you look in the mirror and ask yourself questions.
Because I recently had lunch with a beautiful older woman who told me she couldn’t recommend the facelift and laser treatment she’d had (which she said felt like a blow torch on her face), I’m not considering a facelift.
Is Your Faith Sagging?
I have been considering how to repair my sagging faith. Like aging skin, faith can lose its strength so gradually that you don’t even notice. It isn’t that I’ve neglected my faith routine any more than I’ve neglected my skin care.
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I couldn’t sleep. Not because of worry about a loved one or a crisis or impending deadlines. I couldn’t sleep because I suddenly felt the enormity of trying to do it all.
Not Just a Matter of Managing Time
I’ve always been fond of the notion that if I find the right time management approach, I’ll be able to do it all. I’ve been testing a different method of getting things done each week and I keep finding ways to be productive. But none of my task hacks have decreased my giant list of things I think I should be doing–and doing well.
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