How to Let Go

relationships, inspiration, ChristianWhether it’s a relationship, a dream, or an activity you’ve enjoyed, letting go is hard. I’m having to let go of a lot in this new year and it’s been really hard. I ruminate about it, get angry, and depressed. Maybe you can relate.

The psychologist in me has a lot of solutions for my letting go woes. But my experience has been that while psychology can offer us tools, the Word of God is what powers them. Here’s the Bible’s How To for letting go:

Mourn

John 11:35 tells us Jesus wept. That’s important.

When I was in clinical practice, I saw many people who felt it wasn’t appropriate to mourn their loss. These same people had the hardest time adjusting. Because our Lord mourned, we can feel confident that mourning is acceptable.

Mourning can be crying alone or with others. It can involve writing about how you feel or sharing it with someone you trust.

Think

Philippians 4:8 tells us: Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Once we have mourned the loss, it’s time to take control of our thinking–and we can control it. Ruminating about the past and feeling sorry for ourselves will have a real impact on our physical and emotional health. Every time the loss comes to mind, repeat a comforting Scripture, get busy, or reach out to help someone else.

Don’t give up. Changing our thinking takes time and the help of the Holy Spirit. Pray for the mind of Christ.

Trust

Proverbs 3:5-6 says: Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. 

I cannot let go if I’m afraid. If I don’t believe that God is trustworthy, I will continue to cling to the past as the Israelites clung to Egypt–even though it was a dysfunctional life.

The best way to build trust is to get to know someone better. So it is with the Lord. Spend extra time in prayer and in the Word to be reassured that God has not forsaken you.

Hope

1 Thessalonians 4:13 exhorts: But we do not want you to be uninformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others do who have no hope.

We begin the process of letting go with mourning, but we do not mourn as those who don’t hope in the Lord. While we have to let go many times in life, our heartache isn’t in vain. Our Savior has won a victory for us that will make our losses seem small.

To instill hope, recall past times when you have had to let go and the Lord has seen you through. Praise Him for His love and faithfulness.

Are you having a hard time letting go? Tell me about it.

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