Comparison Is An Ugly Thing

I recently began homeschooling my 7th grade daughter. This is nothing unique. There are many moms who homeschool. But what makes my situation different from that of many other homeschooling moms is that I work full-time, outside of the home, four days a week. Yet, I have chosen to homeschool.

After my daughter finished her elementary school tenure, I became restless in my heart for her. I began to ask the Lord if I could perhaps be a homeschool mom. Call me crazy, but I was willing to add one more thing to my plate in order to do what I felt was best for her. But I was hesitant to share with others what I was doing. I feared what they would think of me. After all, I didn’t met the criteria of what a homeschooling mom looked like, at least in my own mind.

Allow me to paint a picture for you:

This woman is a youthful, vibrant mom with 2.5 babies on her hip and a few older children. She works diligently and faithfully to keep her home neat and tidy, spends countless hours meal planning, coupon clipping and grocery shopping, in order to have healthy and delicious meals on the table every night. She is a taxi driver for almost an entire neighborhood of children as she carts them back and forth to Karate, swimming, baseball and dance. As teacher, she is diligent in selecting her homeschooling curriculum and maintains a spotless classroom, complete with a chalkboard and world globe. She has her children in bed each night by 8:00pm so she and her husband can cuddle up on the couch and have three hours of uninterrupted quality chat time.

Who am I kidding?

I want so desperately to be this mom. The one who appears to have it all together. But I know that this woman simply does not exist. I want to focus my time and attention on the things that truly matter, and believe that God will give me the strength and grace to accomplish what He’s called me to do.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13 – NKJV)

It’s been a hard couple of months, but I am learning to see myself as worthy of the title of “homeschooling mom”. I have to work harder to get my lessons planned ahead of time in order and keep my daughter on track, but it’s all worth it. I need to stop comparing myself to other moms. Comparison makes me feel ugly inside and makes my view of the world even uglier. My life will never look like that of the woman who is sitting next to me in church. I may not appear to have it all together like the mom blogger who I adore. My husband my not get the chat time he deserves each night. But I am me, and I am learning to be the best me that I know how to be, with God’s help.

I am a good mom because I do my best to care for my children.

I am a better mom because I love my husband and do my best to care for my home.

I am the best mom only because I serve a God who gives me the strength and wisdom I need each and every day.

What is it that you feel God is calling you to that you have not been able to fully embrace because you are too busy comparing yourself to those around you? Will you allow God to show you how you can be successful with what it is He’s called YOU to do?

(photo credit)

4 Responses to Comparison Is An Ugly Thing
  1. Wendy
    October 5, 2012 | 12:31 am

    Barbie, you are an inspiration to me, simply because you don’t pretend to have it all together. I LOVE that about you. That makes you real and approachable, for me. You are so brave to take the steps and be who God called you to be, even though it does not look the same way to everyone else’s homeschooling standard. Even I do not fit the mold. My children are loved, taken care of, and call me the best teacher ever. In their eyes, I am. That’s all that matters!

    • Barbie
      October 6, 2012 | 9:39 am

      Wendy, thank you so much for encouraging my heart today. It’s so important to follow God’s leading and be who He has called each of us to be, individually. Have a blessed weekend.

  2. Dolly
    October 19, 2012 | 1:27 pm

    Dear Barbie,
    You are amazing, and you are sharing wisdom as we cannot be who God calls us to be if we compare…God keeps reminding me that if I compare then my eyes are on someone else instead of on Him, and His love for me…so I keep asking His for forgiveness and grace to keep my eyes fixed on Him alone…praying His love and peace on you 🙂

    • Barbie
      October 19, 2012 | 5:10 pm

      Thank you my friend! I so appreciate you coming to visit here and encouraging my heart today.