As the sun rises, my feet hit the floor and I stammer into the shower. How could it possibly be morning already? My body is tense, still feeling the weight of yesterday and already taking on the cares of the morning. As I stand beneath the warm water I pray, “Lord, give me grace for another day”.
And these days have been blurry lately. There seems to be no start or finish, rather just one continuous blob of “more to do”.
My daily routine begins as I prepare my youngest for school and head off to work. I love the church where I am privileged to work. There is a constant flow of people and I love what I do. But ministry can be exhausting as well.
Then it’s home for dinner. Actually, what is for dinner? I haven’t had time to menu plan for months and we’ve been sort of flying by the seat of our pants in that department. I am so thankful for my husband who doesn’t mind grocery shopping and preparing dinner on a whim.
My evenings are filled with dishes, homework, baths, showers and laundry, among other things. And why is there always so much laundry? Please tell me I am not the only mom whose children frantically search for something to wear each morning amongst baskets of washed but unfolded laundry. I can never seem to get caught up.
I have projects that need to get done. Oh, and I am planning my daughter’s wedding. There is so much more to do. Yet I find it’s easier to plop myself down on the couch with an “I will do it tomorrow” attitude. But tomorrow never seems to come.
“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” (Matthew 11:28-29)
I am tired. And in my tired state, I have been neglecting the One who is equipped to give me the fuel I need to make it through each day. This very fuel is a necessity for my mind, body and spirit to function at the level I need in order to be successful. I must consistently come to get my tank filled up, lest I stop functioning all together.
God promises that when I come to Him, He will show me how to rest. He doesn’t just give me rest, but He actually demonstrates rest. He helps me to rid my calendar of unnecessary tasks and appointments by giving me the courage to lay down those things that I’ve been holding onto that were never a part of His plan. And He helps me to say “no” in the moment, when those little “people pleasing” tasks come my way. He is always quick to pour out His grace, because He knows that I cannot do life on my own.
And so I come back to the Father. To the One who teaches me unforced rhythms of grace. For this is what I desire. I want to LIVE life, not be tossed to and fro by the burdens I carry. I picture this grace as flowers gently moving in the wind. They always move in the same direction as the wind. To me, they look as if they are dancing. Effortless. Full of grace. This is how I want to live life — constantly moving, effortless and gracefully, in the direction my Heavenly is calling me.