One of my dearest friends was on the platform and one sentence she said in her message changed my life.
“Sometimes you have to do it scared.”
Almost every time I have said yes to God I’ve had to do it scared.
Scared of the “what if’s.”
What if I’m wrong?
What if I fail?
What if I succeed?
What if I totally mess everything up?
What if this is more than I can handle?
During my last two pregnancies I wasn’t a happy pregnant person.
In fact, it was one of the most difficult times in my life.
I fell into a pit of depression and sadness.
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Parenting has the tendency to threaten our peace with fear, doesn’t it?
There are several ways the enemy can plant seeds of fear into our head, threatening to sink deep into our heart & destroy the peace that Jesus provides.
- Fear of Failure as a Parent/Step Parent
- Fear that our child(ren) will reject Jesus
- Fear that our finances will collapse
- Fear that our child(ren) will get sick or hurt
- Fear that we’ll damage our children somehow
Fear is ugly
The Holy Spirit brings 2 Timothy 1:7 to mind, and two words jump out at me:
Sound Mind
I’ve been reading through Bonnie Gray’s book Finding Spiritual Whitespace, as well as blogging my way through my personal Journey to Rest.
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Since childhood, I’ve been afraid. Afraid of death. Afraid of the stories describing a heavenly measuring rod. Afraid of the judgement. Afraid I wouldn’t ever be good enough to escape the consequences of sin and make it to the better place. Afraid of myself, my inadequacies, me — so quick-to-sin. A child afraid. A teenager afraid. Trying to get good graces and accolades. Wanting so badly to be told I was “good”. Seeking affirmation. Wishing so badly to escape the constant heaviness of realized imperfections.
Funerals made me catch my breath, hollowness in my soul, eyes dry and staring, unable to wrap my mind around the impossible forever of what-comes-next?
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