Last month, here on 5 Minutes for Faith, I wrote about the day God stopped me in my tracks. He reminded me that no matter what I think I know, only He knows the full and complete picture of His plans.
That same day, although I don’t remember what I was reading at the time, this verse was put in front of me.
God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.
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Sometimes God stops us in our tracks…for our own good.
I was recently on my knees in prayer…over a situation I have no control.
A situation that was getting the best of me.
I didn’t know what to pray anymore, and I’d moved to just trying to prepare myself for whatever might happen.
While I talked with God, something changed in how I was praying.
“I know what you’re doing here God, and…”
Immediately, I felt God ask me…
“Do you know what I’m doing?”
My breath caught sharply, and I thought of the book of Job when God gets fed up with Job and challenges him with a lot of questions.
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Blessings have always seemed to be the symbol of the favor of God, of being in His will. And when they’ve rained down upon my head, I have to say that I have felt incredibly loved by God.
Not that I deserved the blessings – never, ever will that be the case. But maybe I felt that, by receiving them, I’d reached some sort of apex. A finish line, of sorts.
That’s how I used to think. Now I know differently.
Blessings are not what bring fulfillment to this life. If you don’t believe this, think back over the blessings in your life.
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For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” II Timothy 1:7
When I think about some of the women who have made the largest impact on my life, I find that these women quite often had a gentleness about them. A gentleness that I desperately would want to emulate. I can’t say the number of times that I would try to do just that, only to have my own personality rise to the surface again and again…and again.
I finally realized that I needed to embrace the ME that God created me to be.
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Seasons change.
Life changes.
The past year has been one of many changes for my family. We’ve suffered two deaths, weathered the acceptance of Aspergers, tackled new job responsibilities, and continued with our plans to create our dream home in the piney woods of East Texas next year.
Life is changing, that much is for sure, and I’m working hard to accept each new change with the grace and dignity He would have me to. Change is like turning a page on a fresh book…and each new chapter is beckoning me, calling my name.
The thing is, change doesn’t always feel so great.
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“Then he said to Him, “If your presence does not go with us, do not bring us up from here.” Exodus 33:15
Though I remember little about the Experiencing God bible study by Henry and Richard Blackaby I did years ago, the thing that stuck with me was this… see where God is moving and join him.
What a revelation that was for someone like me a planner who usually rallied the troops to join me in working or doing things for God or others. But it makes sense. Why toil at my own plans that ultimately fail when God’s are best?
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