Never left out

by Mary


“I didn’t like it today when Ella liked Tommy more than me.” My six year old had a rough time on a play date when his ‘favorite girl’ had her cousin visiting and they all had trouble making the 3-way playgroup work.

Just a few short weeks ago though, he was the one in the middle as we visited far-away friends. His closest chum from infancy hung back a bit while his sister enthusiastically did whatever Bug initiated. By the end of our visit it was clear that his buddy was feeling left out too. At the time, it was hard to get Bug to see why he needed to make more of an effort to reach out to his pal when it was easier just to play with Sis. He understood a little better once he was on the ‘left out’ side of things.

It’s easy to be enticed by the more enthusiastic attention. We all want to be sought out and feel ‘prized.’ And sometimes we give up too easily when the other person is shy or quieter or insecure and it’s our effort required.

Even in the blogosphere we find ourselves competing for attention (or comments) from people who have captured our fancy. We feel left out when they don’t respond to the comments we leave them or when they don’t visit us in return.

When I start to feel that way, I try to remind myself of the reason I started blogging to begin with. Yes, I love the sense of community I’ve found among readers who visit consistently and are willing to dialog with me. Building friendships with people I haven’t had occasion to meet yet makes the days of fellowship with only people under 6 feel much less isolating.

But I started my blog as a way to record the presence of God in my daily life. When I get caught up in looking for responses or visits from people I consider ‘elite,’ I become guilty of ‘leaving out’ my own Favorite and the One I intended to hang out with from the beginning.

In our circle of friends, at church, in our blogs, there is room for many to join our playdates. But I’m grateful that even if others choose to ‘play’ with the more popular or outspoken or funny (or whatever I’m insecure about this week), I have a perpetual audience of One who always shows up just for me and never leaves me left out.

I will never fail you nor forsake you. (Heb. 13:5)

Email Author    |    Website About Mary

Mary Pielenz Hampton (aka RefreshMom) is "midlife mom" to two boys, a train-loving 9 year old and 6 year old superhero-in-the-making. She and her husband Dean will celebrate their 17th anniversary this summer. When she's not shepherding/corralling boys, she's also a friend, writer, at-home-businesswoman, bargain hunter, teacher, lover of tea, chocolate and fancy desserts (especially if made with chocolate). Her heart is looking for God in the smallest moments of life and giving praise back to Him by "turning the daily into devotion."

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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Deb November 17, 2009 at 12:52 pm

A great analogy! Thanks for the reminder!!


2 elaine November 18, 2009 at 10:34 am


Love this. I, too, have had to re-evaluate why I blog, and it finally comes down to the fact that I love to write. If someone gets blessed along the way, great. As long as the pen allows, I’ll keep writing. It’s my “creative” overflow friend.



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